Thanks Guys for all the advice!
I am now more frightened then ever. But in a good way. I am sceptical that the only best approach is asking other sites to link. I just wonder if that approach if done by these big SEO companies, I doubt they go to each competitor and offer them tons of money for a good backlinks. But I know that is the White Hat approach.....
What else would be good white hat methods to find backlinks that do not take too much time? possible a service?
I am also trying to get my blog up in the ranks too. Maybe its a good idea to play russian roulette with the blog first.